Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Four Things

1. Is he singing in english?
2. His hairstyle would never fly in America.
3. What is up with that female judge?
4. How unenthusiastic is the crowd and how weird is their clapping?

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Stranger in a Strange Land

Someone just came over to me and said "I saw your blog - what's it called - 'A miserable disaster?'"

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Flying As Usual

So I finally made it to Israel but not without some glitches.

As usual, I brought one suitcase for myself and one for someone else. As usual my housekeeper packed the one for someone else (ok, she packed both). As usual, I had absolutely no idea what was in bag #2. As usual, when security asked me who packed the bags, I told them that I did (I'm not falling for that!).

My usual routine was working until after I put both my bags through the x-ray and the security person came over to me. "What's in the red suitcase?" she asked. Of course, I had no idea what was in bag #2, so as usual, I went to backup plan: act dumb (or more specifically, get them to let me open the bag). "They're both red, so I can't tell you what's in that bag," I smartly responded.

"Are there books in the bag?"
"Umm...yes." (I couldn't tell if this was a test)
"How many?"
"A few."
"How many?"
"Like three...or five."
"How thick are the books?"
"They're just like regular book thickness"
"Are there some type of large liquid bottles in the bag?"
"Ya, I think so" (Again, I didn't know if this was a test) - "Can I just open the bag?"

Finally she let me open the bag, which contained neither books nor any type of bottles.

But by far the weirdest part of the whole trip was on the customs line in Israel when old chinese women started petting stranger's kids.

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Yom Kippur & Me

Another year, another Yom Kippur. A time to pray, a time to reflect, a time to starve. This year I decided to try a new approach. I would daven at three different places. At night I davened at a Yeshiva; In the morning at a shul; and in the afternoon at someone's house who had a minyan for an organization dedicated to helping young people find themselves (that's the best way I can put it). The one thing they all had in common was uncomfortable chairs.

Despite being the worst day of the year for me, I'm positive that it's the best day for kids. You get to do whatever you want all day while your parents are busy in Shul. This usually entails running around the shul with as much candy and snacks as you can possibly fit into the knapsack you brought along with you. Also, forget having to brush your teeth or wash your hands and face - no, no, this is Yom Kippur. And don't forget - you get to wear a suit with sneakers. How cool?

Yom Kippur really is a day of reflection and looking ahead. I can tell you personally that I reflected on all the best things I ate this past year and all the things that I'd like to eat this coming year (things I didn't even know I liked).

There were some surprising moments also. Like this morning when I realized that it was also Shabbos. Or on my way to mincha when I realized I was wearing my leather Shabbos shoes.

I'm already counting down the days till next year.