Sunday, October 24, 2010

Finally - A Jewish YouTube Star

You saw it here first.
See his other videos here.

If you know who this is, please email me here

Thursday, October 21, 2010

My Life: Part 2 - Is Anyone Reading This?

So last week wasn’t so bad. I wonder what will happen if I keep doing this. Will my brain hit a dead end like Will Truman hitting the end of the world in The Truman Show? That was a good reference. I’ll give myself that. It’s only 8:41AM and I’m already feeling good about myself.

What is everyone always text messaging about? Sometimes I feel like the whole world is planning to play a giant prank on me, communicating through texting. Does that make me paranoid? I don’t think so! What was that? I just heard something.

When will Microsoft Word recognize that texting is a real world? Update your dictionary Bill Gates - this isn’t Microsoft ‘95.

If I were a train conductor, I’d probably complain about the uniform. The hats just seem a little unnecessary; it’s rarely ever that sunny on a train.

I’m not afraid to admit that I’m never entirely sure about when to use a semi-colon or if I’m using it correctly. On the other hand, I have mastered the use of the .period

My paragraphs are really short today. At best, they look more like run on sentences.

It’s fun to look at what other people are reading on the train and subway. But they seem to get annoyed when I read along. Out loud. Especially when it’s a crossword puzzle. It’s fun to whisper the answer and then look away.

Editors note: Do you guys enjoy these posts? Think they're funny? dumb? Leave a comment, brotha.

Man vs. Machine: Bowling

If only we had this on our bowling team in high school.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Armless Pianist Wins China's Got Talent

"Lost his arms from an accident at age 10, Liu Wei from Beijing never gives up living strong. He managed to do everything with his feet and started to learn to play piano at age 19. His dream is to become a musician. He is now 22 and just won the China's Got Talent Show on Oct. 10, 2010. In the final, he played piano and sang the song "You Are Beautiful", perhaps his vocal is not the best render of this song, but the power and inspiration of his zest for life won him the final. "

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Thursday, October 7, 2010

My Life: What were to happen if I just started typing?

Editors Note: I am starting a new series that will run every Thursday called "My Life." As you'll learn, it's very random and doesn't necessarily have to do with my life. If you enjoy it, share it with someone you love or hate. And as always, leave a freakin' comment.

What were to happen if I just started typing? Where would my mind take me? This is a fun experiment. The challenge is keeping up with my mind since I'm not such a fast typer, especially on an iPad. Ok I think that's it. My mind has gone blank. I'm not sure if it's because I'm tired or too self-conscious about what I'm typing. Oh no, I just used the word self-conscious. I'm very self-conscious about using that word.

One paragraph - that's not so bad. I don't know how people write books. I think writers are just really shy loud people.

New topic - I hate when people stand in bad places. For example: standing in doorways or in front of any food table. Do these people not realize they're in a bad spot? Get out of my way! Don't they get the hint when everyone growls "excuse me." Can you not find another place to carry on your desperate attempt at a conversation? And one last thing: don’t stand in front of or behind my car and then complain when I hit you.

I feel bad for people whose natural face looks like they're angry. I feel bad but I still laugh at the thought when I see them. Because I know they're just relaxing or spacing out and yet everyone is looking at them and thinking "what are you so upset about?"

I want to try and fill up a page. I think then I'll feel like I accomplished something today. Who said accomplishing something today would be easy? Maybe I should try a smaller piece of paper. Or a larger font.

I’m having writer’s block. I'm not entirely sure what that is but it sounds like a legitimate excuse. It is either that or a stomachache and the former seems more plausible.

If I were a horse I would dress up as a zebra and see if anyone noticed.

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Why it Makes More Sense to Wear Sweatshirts in the Summer

It’s that time of the year again: sweater season (or sweatshirt season, depending on your income). This can be kind of a big deal. But not for me. That’s because I know no season that’s not sweater season. In fact, I think it makes more sense to wear sweatshirts in the summer months than in the winter months.

If you’re like me, you’re awkward, good-looking, and popular. But even if you’re not like me, you may spend just as much time indoors as me. In fact, in a typical 24-hour day, I spend an average of 10 minutes outdoors (walking to and from my car). That comes out to .6% of a day. I spend more time tying my shoes then I do outdoors, and my shoes don’t even have laces.

I love the great indoors – the artificial feel of a climate-controlled room; the smell of fresh cookies baking from the outlet; the comfort of standing on a plush rug that lays atop an even plusher carpet.

The thing about the indoors is that it is usually the inverse temperature of the outdoors. So for the winter months, the heat is blasting inside and it’s as hot as my laptop gets when I use it on my bed – you would be crazy to wear a sweater. In the summer, the cold air is flowing from the air conditioner like wind on a cold winter day – the perfect time for a zip-up hoodie.

Secondly, wearing sweatshirts in the summer is really cool and a great way to get attention, especially if you’re looking for people to tell you that you look hot (oh my gosh I can’t even look at you). When it comes down to it, wearing a sweatshirt to the beach is as hip as wearing sunglasses at night or a blackberry around your ankle.

And that’s why it makes more sense to wear sweatshirts in the summer.